Sorority girl, yelling: Umm and fuck don't even rhyme!

-- University Place

Guy: ...maybe I won't teach my kids beer pong.

overheard by: J

Girl: And I was like, I just put my hand down your pants! And you want to go to sleep?!

-- line for Starbucks, Norris

overheard by: T.

Sorority Girl 1: I can't believe he cheated on me with his ex. I am never going to forgive him.
Sorority Girl 2: But you cheated on him like 3 times. With different guys.
Sorority Girl 1: ....yeah. I guess we're even.

-- In class, Harris 107

overheard by: lauren v.