TA to near-tears freshman girl: ...but if you get a B I'm not going to find you, like, swinging in your bedroom, right?

-- outside Harris Hall

overheard by: anonymous

Dude: I don't like social drinking unless sexual rewards are involved.

-- Core, University Library

overheard by: E.

Girl: She is so beautiful. She must live off diet coke and coke.

-- Sheridan road

overheard by: brendon.

Drunk girl: If I had an eskimo, would you make sure it didn't fart on my face?

-- Sheridan road

overheard by: jeffrey m.